The unique role and function of a wife in marriage is to “help” her husband. Created according to the ideal of God as a “helper” for man (Genesis 2:18-23), wives function in a complementary role to their husbands: fundamentally equal (Genesis 1:27) in all aspects of creation (value, identity, competency), yet distinct in the essential function they play within marriage.

Despite cultural misconceptions, being a “helper” is not a demeaning or derogatory position. Rather, it is a highly esteemed position of great significance and honor - even God Himself is described as our “help” or “helper” throughout Scripture, and He’s not demeaned or degraded in any way (see Psalm 33:20; 46:1; 70:5).

Being a “helper” does not come naturally to a woman. Left to the natural disposition of her sinful heart, a wife is resistant to her husband, obstinate to his role in the home and overall a source of tension and conflict in the marriage. Proverbs 12:4 says a wife of this nature brings “rottenness” to her husbands bones. Proverbs 21:19 suggests that it would be better for a husband to live on the roof of his house than share a home with an indignant wife. Proverbs 27:15-16 likens a quarrelsome wife to the torturous and perpetual dripping of water that is as easy to restrain as it is to control the wind. When operating from a position of sin and selfish desires a wife will not be a willing helper but rather a hostile partner.

It is in this tension, between God’s created design of a wife to help her husband and sin’s complete corruption and fracturing of this essential function, that the need for Jesus is most evident, and a new and redeemed pursuit of marriage most needed.

In the book of Ephesians Paul calls wives to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). He ends his discourse with a caveat about marriage, explaining that it’s greater and higher purpose is to point to the person of Jesus and the love He has for His people, the Church (Ephesians 5:32). Ultimately, God’s redemptive agenda for wives is to redeem their essential function in marriage from the corruption of sin and restore it back to its created design. God’s call on wives to submit to their husbands stands in direct contrast to their natural disposition of defiance and hostility. When a wife willingly and freely submits, she does so as a demonstration of God’s redeeming work in her and Jesus’ reconciling love towards His people. She ultimately puts the Gospel on display – the work of Jesus in redeeming all things back to Himself – including marriage.

Even in His exalted position, God submitted Himself to humanity in the incarnation and again submitted through Jesus on the Cross in the crucifixion. Likewise, wives are to submit to their husbands so the redemptive work of God in His submission through Jesus is put on display.

Submission is not a loss of independent thought, a negation of intelligence or competency or a resolution of all influence and ideas. Rather, it is a wife’s willful commitment to declaring and demonstrating the Gospel through her unique role within the marriage. It has absolutely nothing to do with her inherent value, competency or significance. It has everything to do with her understanding of the Gospel.

Submission is a wife’s choosing to love her husband like Jesus has loved her – fully, unconditionally, sacrificially, submissively.

Wives: How are you seeking to “help” your husband as God has helped you in Jesus? In what ways can you love your husband better so that it is more reflective of God’s love for you in Jesus?

Join Woodlands Point this Sunday, February 20th as we continue the “Family Defined” series, where we are exploring how the Gospel defines marriage, family and parenting. This week’s topic is “Women and Marriage”. We will discuss what biblical submission practically looks like, what it is and what it absolutely is not.

Incoming search terms:

• wife submissive your husband
• the woodland point community church tx
• reconciling a marriage quotes
• Marriage Advice For Women
• genesis 2:18-23
• loving her quotes
• Blogs on loving your husband
• when you love your husband you love Jesus
• wives love your husbands jesus
• woman and marriage in genesis

Tags: Acts 29, church in the woodlands tx, gospel, gospel centered church, marriage, the woodlands tx, women, woodlands point community church

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 16th, 2011 at 12:47 pm and is filed under Pastor's Blog.